Through the PTO I found my Christmas Spirit. I spent much of November and December at the Intermediate School and the Elementary schools that my kids attend.
I watched the kids, the teachers, fellow volunteer moms come in smiling and wearing their Christmas gear. Slowly my mind, then my heart opened up to the idea of actually enjoying Christmas.
This was amazing for me. Previous years I had struggled to muddle through the holiday season. The baking a chore, the decorating pure torture. But this year was different. I wanted to participate. I wanted to dress the part.
I admit, it took a little convincing for me to get my Christmas Tree up before Thanksgiving. And I did, the Monday before we left to travel home for the holiday. I pulled it out of the box only after setting my playlist to Christmas songs. I was in my zone. Then momentary tragedy struck as I was unable to figure out how to get my pre-lit tree to light up. Over an hour later when I am near to tears and ranting on fb, my husband comes home. For him it had been a long day, but still he pulled that tree apart studying each part, and looking over the box. Finally he asks me where the rest of the lights were and through that patience, we figured out that the lights were indeed there, just in the other box.
The next day I began again, a fresh start, well intent on success through my playlist. My kids were eager to join in and we made it happen.
I was quite impressed with my tree. I was actually happy with it. Something I did not feel in 2017 or 2018. Two years! It had really been 2 years since I was happy with my Christmas tree.
As the weeks passed by, I would just sit and stare at my tree and feel tranquil. I even bought a Christmas T shirt, a first for me in a long time. I added a few new ornaments and decorations to my collection.
Now that it is time to roll into the new year, I am ready. My ornaments are all packed away. I organized them according to color. I took great care to pack them up well. While doing this, I realized that this was the first year in awhile that I actually cared how they were packed up. My wonderful husband even agreed to let me buy a second tree, and finally I will have my long dreamed of white Christmas tree. I even purchased four sets of brand new shatter proof ornaments. I find myself ready for the new year, and ready to decorate my two trees.
I have also discovered a new passion of collecting red birds. My husband even commented on this odd new obsession when we at the local big box store and I am trying to hurriedly scan two red bird ornaments that were not on the grocery list. I am sure this is due to my own mother's love of ceramic red birds and my desire to keep her memory close as the years roll on without her.
Happy New Year Everyone!
in memory of Carol L Smithson Rhodes (my dearly departed mom)
