The Harlots Path

This is a story of a young girl whose mother always called her a slut,and a whore.  She didn't know exactly what it meant, but she knew it was a bad thing. This young girl loved to read. This gave her a chance to escape the reality around her. She would read anything that she could get her hands on and somehow she came across Harlequin Romance books. It was through these books that she got the idea that someday a man was going to come and sweep her off her feet. She also learned that when you were in love you did all kinds of things.

During one Aunt's visit, she was astounded that her young niece was reading such adult books, books that even she didn't read. She was a very devout Christian and she was always urging her brother to go to church, to take his daughters to church. He didn't want to go though because he knew their mother would want to go and he found her such an embarrassment. He had no idea that his daughter was reading such adult books. But what could he do? He wasn't around all the time, so there wasn't much he could do. He knew he could tell her all day long not to, but once he left she would because out of defiance her mother would let her.

This young girl was lost. Her home life was a horrible mess. Her mother was always telling her how horrible her father was. After all he had left and when he left the story goes he told her she was fat and very embarrassing. How could he just throw away nineteen years of marriage. Things got really bad when he walked out as she would put it. She always made sure that her daughters knew that all men were worthless and they only wanted one thing.

After he moved out he tried to come over as often as possible, but really wasn't around much, he worked a lot.  He was a good father, he didn't show a lot of affection, he probably didn't realize how vital it was to show affection to his daughters. He left pretty much everything to do with raising daughters up to his ex wife. All the decisions on how they dressed, did their  hair, whatever, it was up to her. If they complained to him about their mother being mean or hitting them or something he would tell them that they had probably done something to deserve it.

The girl doesn't know what is true and what is not true. She thinks it must be like this in all families. She loves going to school because she can escape the madness at home. Even being bullied at school isn't quite as bad as being home with her mother. Her mother has no idea how to be happy and doesn't want anyone else to be happy. She fights for control over her daughter's lives. It doesn't matter to her if they like what she makes them do or wear. What matters is that she is in complete control. But you see the oldest was growing up, she was starting to notice the world around her.

There aren't really any positive influences around her. Sometimes she goes to stay with her Christian Aunt and goes to church. But she didn't hear God's call. She would go to the Sunday school with her cousins, she would sing the songs and pretend to listen to the sermon, but she really didn't hear the message.

Things started looking up for her when she got to the eighth grade, she finally found a friend that was like her. They both walked to school and started talking. Through this friend she discovered heavy metal music and how easy it was to relate to those lyrics. She went to her first concert and fell madly in love with the lead singer of the band. Finally she had something she could love. Something that could tell her story and she could find release from the pain all around her. She still didn't fit in. But she learned that black was her favorite color and would wear solid black for the next several years.

Now sometime during her eighth grade year she thought she was ready to go to the next level. There was this guy who was in ninth grade but ran track at the high school. Every day he would walk from the Junior High to the High School, and he just happened to walk by her house. So she started talking to him and doing her best to flirt with him, but it wasn't really working. So this one day he comes into her house, That day there was no one home. It was such a beautiful sunny day and the sunlight was pouring in through her bedroom windows. They start to make out and she is feeling so confused. Why isn't this going they way it does in the books? Why aren't the angels singing and the birds chirping and where are the sparks and the fire? He senses something is off, so he pushes away and realizes she isn't ready, not by a long shot. When she starts to cry and explain that she wants the magic the books describe he laughs and tells her it isn't really like that. And then leaves.

Now she is all confused, the girls always talked about how much fun it was. They chattered all through lunch about the things they did with their high school boyfriends. They made fun of her for not knowing or doing these things. They were even smoking in the bathroom! What was wrong with her?

When her one friend moved away and she could only see her one weekend a month, she felt really lost. Her mother was even more angry at her now that she was older and listened to heavy metal. One day the girl decided she would start wearing all black, she grew her hair out long and when she wore make up it was black. She did this for the next several years. Black made her feel more invisible, more able to face what was out there. The music gave her an escape. But she still desperately wanted to be like the other girls.

She started hanging out with some new girls. They were her age, and one of them had an older sister. The older sister was a bit on the wild side. One of the girls was like her and more shy and didn't really date and had never done anything with a  boy outside of kissing. The other girl had and she had a looser boyfriend who drank and smoked and they did it all of the time. They hung around some other girls who were the same. When she would go to the girls house she would sometimes feel afraid and other times she would enjoy the wild joy rides in the Dad's cars. She was horrified when she would see the couples in bed together. But somehow she new this is how it was supposed to be. This was how you became cool.

There was a boy who lived close to her. It wasn't really an attraction, but more a curiosity. He was bad news through and through. He talked about there being no God, but she was pulled into his web of deception. She gave him her virtue and began a horrible pattern of giving in to boys wishes. She knew in school that condoms were a must yet settled for saran wrap. He now had a grip on her mind, the night mares would wake her in the middle of the night. She had to fight to free herself from the darkness. But the worst was when she decided to do the deed the very afternoon her grandparents were coming  for a visit. Then her mother started telling them what a good girl she was. Shame burned all through her.

Thus the pattern was set, the path before her was becoming brighter. She didn't look back, she didn't look for another way out, she just continued on. The path was surrounded by dense foliage and the only sounds were that of despair and worthlessness. She began fighting even more with her mother. She became a very bitter young woman. She was lost.

The second boyfriend she tried to control. She gave in, she did things she never should have done. She snuck out in the middle of the night she lost all self worth by letting things go to lengths that no decent young lady should ever go to. She knew shame first hand. Being caught by his father in the act, after the parents had let her come over multiple times for visits. The unthinkable happened and the shame deepened as did the feelings of hopelessness. It was during this time that she began to really act out. She would pour bleach over her head, she wanted to die so badly. She knew what was going on with her body. She knew there was only one way out and she would never tell her father. Only her mother could help her out of this mess.

It was a horrible trip a horrible experience. Yet she came out of it on top and for a short time she vowed to change her ways but she had no idea how. All of her friends were like her they just did whatever they wanted. They didn't listen to their parents. Some even smoked and drank alcohol, but she never did.

She fell into a hopeless pattern that would continue throughout high school. She did manage to meet a young man her senior year that seemed like a dream come true. But due to her unhappiness and her inability to not be selfish she had no idea how to make it work. She was always angry and given to very angry outbursts, so it didn't work out.

Then she was thrust into a different world, a world after divorce. Now the irony of this was that now she knew God. She had found him while being married. She wanted to stay with God and did for a time, but she was so lonely and some of her friends were inviting her to party with them.  The church she once attended she had stopped going to because her ex husband went there. At another church she started going to, she realized she worked with several of the people. They didn't seem to notice or care, and none reached out a hand to welcome her into this new fold. So she turned her back on God, she stepped off the narrow path and onto the wide path. She gave her soul up to cigarettes and alcohol. She became a girl who could drink with the best of them. Who loved Vodka and how it could erase her mind.

She loved men, she loved to use men. She loved to manipulate them, to tease them but to not give in to all of them. Some of them she would use just to use. She would still be living he life but not with the one that was spoiling her. She loved the power she got from bringing them down. She ignored God all the while.

This time she kept the baby. This time she vowed it would be different. She tried so hard, she even went to school. But it was at the school that she found a girl who introduced her to the bar scene and a new personality emerged. One that was completely out of control. One who loved her son with all her might, but within limits. She could give him only so much of herself because the rest of her was out looking for love in all the wrong places.

Drinking and driving and sinning and dancing and parading everything she had for all the world to see. It is a wonder that God ever accepted her back into the fold, but he did.

The point of this is, that we must love our daughters, we must teach them to love themselves. To respect themselves. To save themselves for marriage. We have to guide them down the correct path. This is a job for both parents. God wants our daughters to grow into strong women who can guide their own children and other young women down the narrow path.

It isn't easy to stay on the narrow path but if our eyes are focused on God then we can do it. Love your daughters show them that true beauty comes from within and that waiting for marriage is the best gift that they can give to a husband, for it is God's will.

It is important to reach out to those that are going through troubled times. It is important to set aside time for them. To reach out to them. We must spread God's words, we must love one another as he loved us. If one person had reached out to this girl and really meant it and really stayed with her, this story might have been very different. Sometimes people don't realize they are drowning until it is to late. Pray with out ceasing for everyone. I pray all day as I scroll through my face book page. I pray for everyone on my face book page, you should too.